ADHD Repair After Conflict Worksheet
Slow down after conflict, name the impact, and make one caring repair move without pretending nothing happened.
Step 1 of 5
Choose the closest starting point
What’s the repair problem right now?
Choose the closest sentence. A repair can be small and honest; it does not require a perfect explanation.
Practical ADHD Toolkit · Completed worksheet
ADHD Repair After Conflict Worksheet
- Starting point
- First guided action
- Enough for this round
- Return cue
Use it for one real situation
When this worksheet helps
Adults who want to reconnect after snapping, disappearing, forgetting, or becoming flooded during conflict.
- A conflict is over but the distance remains.
- You need to apologise or acknowledge impact without spiralling into shame.
- You want to repair before returning to logistics or problem-solving.
Different stuck points need different moves
Practical starting paths
Open the situation closest to yours. These examples are options, not answers that are inserted into your worksheet.
I said something hurtful when I was overwhelmed.
Name the specific impact you understand, without adding a long defence or explanation first.
I shut down, left, or stopped replying.
Write one reconnection message that names the gap and offers a realistic next time to talk.
We keep hurting each other around the same pattern.
Name the pattern as a shared problem, then choose one small change to test before the next hard moment.
I feel too ashamed to reach out.
Write the smallest repair move you can tolerate: acknowledge, check in, or ask what would help now.
Only if you need more support
Choose what comes next
Questions that often block progress
Common questions
Do I need to complete every part of this worksheet?
No. Choose the closest problem and write only enough to make the next action visible. One useful line is a successful use.
What if I stop before the task is finished?
Use the restart cue. The worksheet is designed to make returning easier, not to demand a perfect uninterrupted session.
Understand the pattern
Related ADHD guides
Sources and further support
Source material
The ADHD Couple's Guide
Communication Scripts, Repair and Reconnection, Shared Systems
Longer-form support
The ADHD Couple’s Guide
Use an ADHD relationship book for partners and couples to reduce blame, improve communication, and build shared systems that make daily life easier to live in.
Stop the Spiral
Interrupt emotional overload, lower the immediate pressure, and recover the rest of your day.
Independent guidance
NICE guideline NG87: ADHD diagnosis and management
These references set context and safety boundaries; they do not clinically validate each worksheet prompt.